How to save on postage

You can get by without stamps, too, for in-town mailings. Just reverse the positions of your friend’s address and your own return address and omit the stamp.

Then the mailman will return your letter to your friend for postage. Next, a big paddy-wagon will drive up and take you away to the federal pokey, for defrauding the U.S. mails. Thus you’ve saved five cents, plus board and room for the next twenty years.

—Peg Bracken, in the “I Hate to Housekeep Book,” 1958